Well bonjour there, persons! Writing to you from Paris, France today. We have absolutely had an eventful past few days, so I will jump right into this.

Important things first- Taco Hunt '15 is still underway. I thought that you all might have been sitting with your concern over that, so I didn't want to make you wait any longer to hear. Apparently Europe does not enjoy a good taco. I weep for humanity over this situation. 

Moving on. 

Let me just look back here in my files for a moment and remind myself where our adventures left off. Ah, yes, Geneva. It was phenomenal. I have been doing a good bit of research in some of my down time concerning international schools in and around that area because in this moment, Geneva is the fit that I have been searching for. Fret not, I know I still have many places to get to this summer so I am not shutting off my feelers for other places just yet. 

I actually got to talking to Victoire (apparently I make friends everywhere I go on this trip), the sales woman I met in the Swatch store (because you can't go to Switzerland and not go to the Swatch store).

So Victoire and I were talking- she's fascinating by the way: speaks German, English, French, Italian and Mandarin fluently- and she was very knowledgable about the international schools in and around Geneva. So, a huge thank you to Victoire for being born and being awesome. She was a hugehelp in  beginning my search for those schools. 

We only spent a short amount of time in Geneva because we had some skiing to get to, but it was delightful all the same. I will absolutely be back there. So we headed off to Zermatt Wednesday morning-ish. Packed up the rental car and set out for the open road. And by open road I mean one single road- the A9- that runs through a valley in the Swiss Alps for 3 hours and was less than a mile wide, BUT, we did go the length of Lake Geneva and then around it and I have to say that it was absolutely the most breathtaking drive I have ever been on. Switzerland is a flawlessly gorgeous country and I do not know that I could ever tire of looking at its scenery. 

Wallace and I enjoyed some Bugles- or the Swiss equivalent- on the journey. 

I think you all should know that I have fallen in love with apricots all over again on this trip. Apparently we are right in the heart of apricot country and I won't lie to you, they are life-changing. Like, I will not return the same Emilie that I was pre French-Swiss apricots. Mind blown. 

So we happened upon this adorable little apricot stand in the middle of the Swiss Alps:

The proprietor was an absolute gem. I'm telling you, these apricots will change your life. You have no idea. 

So Tabitha, our GPS personality in the car, has a strange sense of direction and I think that maybe she was confused by our cross country adventure because she wasn't the most accurate of navigators and sometimes struggles with telling her left from her right. I will say though that if I ever hear the phrase "Leave the roundabout at the second exit" again, it will be too soon. Also, I feel very confident in saying that Switzerland has the most roundabouts per capita of any of the Alpine nations. Like, I would put money on that statement right there. Way. Too. Many. Roundabouts. If I make it home without having developed Vertigo it will be a huge success. 

We passed mountains on mountains on mountains during our drive. I mean, yes. If you ever want to feel like a tiny dot in the scheme of life, just look out your window at a section of the Alps. These mountains are not like the mountains you may be used to- they do not sprawl across the landscape and fall into rolling hills. Oh, no no. They go straight up and down. Like, terrifyingly steep. But I will get to that more in a moment when we discuss skiing. Get excited. 

So we make it to Tasch which is as far as you can drive into the mountains and then you have to train into Zermatt from there because there are no cars allowed in. Everything that runs inside of the village is electric so as to preserve the quality of the air. Supposedly.

Train selfie into Zermatt-

So, Zermatt. It is one of the only places in the entire country where you can do summer skiing. Because, well, it's summer. So there's that. It is a small village set at the base of the Matterhorn in a tiny little valley between two ranges of mountains. 

I happen to have a picture for you all-

Tell me that those mountains are not a pinch scary looking. Come on. You win, Swiss Alps. You win. 

After dropping our things we head out to mosey around for a bit and we turn the corner in a road and BAM. WE FIND ZE MATTERHORN!

It was just chillin' in the skyline, being all majestic and stoic. Don't mind it.

This little village is one of those places where once you're in, you're in and there insn't really much to do aside from the skiing or hiking. So, ski we did. Oh man. Prepare yourself. I will preface this next part by saying that there are sometimes in life when you quit things because of a lingering fear of the activity and then there are sometimes you quit things because of genuine safety concerns. So just sit with that for a moment. 

Lets get to the real story here- skiing. I am not ashamed to say that I had never skied before this trip, but I will say in hindsight that attempting to ski in the Swiss Alps for the first time without any training whatsoever was not the most brilliant idea I have ever had. It just.. wasn't. But hey- live all the dreams. 

So we wake up early after a pinch of a late night out where we made some new friends from Chicago and California and they definitely showed up with their party game. They requested Sweet Home Alabama for us and insisted that we dance to it. I would put the video up, but I want to spare myself some embarrassment on this trip. And Gentry already put it up on Facebook, apparently, as I am learning now, so it'd be overkill for me to put it here as well. So here's a picture instead. 

Okay, I got side-tracked. We wake up early and head to the ski shop. We get all decked out in our gear and anticipation and excitement are mounting, as well a lot of sweating because it's not exactly cold in the village. 

Gear game strong. Then we jump on the lift and of course selfies-

As this is happening, we realize the gravity of the situation while we are staring down the "slope" we are about to get off at and ski down. Since it is summer season, there is only one slope open and it just so happens to be the steep-enough-to-make-you-cry slope. So. Yes. Anxiety sets in for both of us. Forget you not that I have never skied before and Gentry has not skied since he was 10 years old. Real pros here, folks. 

We continue to ride in the lift, staring down our nemesis from the air and discussing how Switzerland may be the place that we both perish. Life got real on that 20 minute chair lift ride to the top. So real. I envisioned 1 of 2 things happening- me jumping out of that lift and just taking on that slope and killing it the entire way down because my adrenaline was so high OR freezing up at the top and passing out from lack of oxygen because we're that high up and I start hyperventilating. Luckily neither of those happened, but I will tell you what did happen. After another picture, of course. 

That's ZE MATTERHORN wearing a cloud hat. The view was impeccable from the slope. 

Okay, so now that your anticipation has had time to build I present- Emilie's interaction with the Swiss Alps, attn: skiing. 

The lift gets to the top of the mountain and we jump out. And it hits me for real that I have no idea what I am doing. What is this life? I have never skied before in my life nor have I ever had a single ski lesson and here I am at the tippy top of a mountain range in the Swiss Alps right next to the Matterhorn about to attempt some foolishness. So I say to internal Emilie- PULL IT TOGETHER. YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE IT DOWN THIS MOUNTAIN AND YOU ARE GOING TO SIMULTANEOUSLY LOVE AND HATE IT, BUT IT IS GOING TO HAPPEN. That's how I pump myself up for things, by the way. 

There's about 30 feet of relatively flat snow before the slope literally drops off the side of the mountain, so I use those feet to kind of figure out what the hell I am doing with these things attached to my feet and these arm extensions in my hands. I'll put it this way- I starfished on my back. I starfished on my stomach. I fell in the fetal position. I fell butt first, face first, elbows first. You name the pose, I fell in it- downward dog, chaturanga, crouching tiger hidden dragon- the whole gang. I looked like a spider on a hotplate. At one point I just laid on my back and stared up at the sky and thought to myself, "I am close enough to the flight path of the helicopters coming through here, so maybe if I flash the next one that flies by they will just swoop down throw a rope around my waist and fly me off this damn mountain". Yeah, that never happened. But you can't blame me for trying to be inventive. 

So after all of the falling and slowly inching my way over the edge of the drop off the side of the mountain and then falling, freaking out, picking up my skis and trekking back to the top to try agian. After about an hour of doing all that, I finally laid on my back after the last time falling, said some expletives and decided I was getting down that mountain.. via the ski lift that brought me up it. 

And I did just that. After getting to the bottom, I sat for a little bit and watched the slope and all the other people that were attempting it and made friends with a few Australians, had a beer with some Australians, and decided that this mountain was not about to get the best of me. I am in the Swiss Alps after all- it's going down. I put my skis back on, grabbed my poles and instead of going back to the lift to go to the top and have another panic attack I walked up the end of the slope where there were actual manageable hills instead of death defying drops- and skied those for the remainder of the day. All in all, I am calling it a success. I did not die and I did not go into an anxiety induced attack. Little victories folks, little victories. 

Here is a shot of us all decked out in ski gear

and then a mid-ski break selfie

Those goggles are very becoming, I have decided. I may adopt them as everyday sunglasses. 

After a full day of skiing and the emotional turmoil that it inflicted on each of us, we were thoroughly exhausted. We grabbed some sausage sandwich type deal that looked absolutely delicious from a street vendor on the walk back into the village and called the rest of the evening a chill time. Victories all around for that day. All around. 

The next morning we woke up and I performed my ritual just as in every other town the morning we leave- going to the post office. We jumped on the train back to Tasch after that, grabbed the rental car and Tabitha navigated us back to Geneva where we dropped the rental car and headed to Paris. 

Full disclosure- I started this post two days ago and just haven't had the energy or time to finish, so our time in Paris is actually halfway finished; we leave Tuesday. That will have to be another post for another time though because this one is already long and a lot wordier than the others, I understand that. 

I will give a little teaser and tell you all that last night for dinner we had tacos and champagne. If that isn't living every single dream that ever was, then I have no idea what it means to live a dream. Alright, alright, alright- we have dinner to cook this evening and live music to enjoy after that because it is the Day of Music across the entire country of France and every single street corner has a different band or dancer or choir belting out tunes.

Also, the happiest of Father's Days to all of you gentlemen out there who have an offspring to claim. A special shout out to my own amazing and fearless father. All the loves to you daddio since I cannot be with you today. 

I will leave you all with this shot of us cheers-ing to 15 years of friendship. I cannot imagine anyone else in this world that I would have rather had by my side all these years, Gentry. We've been through most anything that life can throw at us and we are still civil to one another and actually sometimes enjoy the company of one another. Here's to the next 15 and so many unlocked chapters in both of our lives. 

Remember America, it's just life- laugh a little.